Of course nobody’s perfect. Doesn’t mean they’re not allowed to expect a base level of emotional intelligence from a partner. ;)

As for the shot you took at the dating pool here, I wouldn’t personally call these people shallow; they were just young. I spent 10 years of my life in a college town. Not hard to find lots of emotional immaturity there, no matter how much of an emotional adult you are yourself. In any case, since it takes some people a long time to outgrow those kinds of antics, I wrote this to help such people recognize a few “tells” that their emotional intelligence isn’t up to snuff — this way, they can course-correct and stop repelling the people they want. Luckily, once I left the college town, the dating pool, shall we say, upgraded itself.

Anyway, re: booty call — definitely wasn’t “months,” precisely because of his behavior. Not sure why you thought it was(?).

As for negging, I don’t know anyone who falls to pieces at an insult, but either way, it’s unattractive in the extreme if someone repeatedly shows that they lack tact or just outright WANT to hurt someone’s feelings.

There are good people in this world — people who’ve already gotten the hang of tact and kindness. Why not choose those people instead? [shrug]