I’ve talked with Current Partner about this in a hypothetical sense; it’s never yet come up in a practical one. He has stated that he prefers the idea of monogamy. At the same time, I’m not sure how he’d feel if non-monogamy with each other ever became a real consideration, so I would bring it up with him again if the occasion arose. He understands (as do I) the ways in which we aren’t entirely compatible, and he’s not a jealous person, so he wouldn’t begrudge if someone new appeared that I felt very strongly about. Current Partner knows I’d like to get married and have children someday, but he’s also made clear that he isn’t interested in marriage (with anyone) and isn’t sure whether he ever wants to be a father. We’ve had serious conversations about this and decided to remain intimately involved with each other for now, but he wouldn’t want to hold me back from those things either.
Moreover, there’s a lot up in the air with respect to each of our futures, such that either of us might end up leaving our current city at any point in time, and the other wouldn’t feel inclined to try to turn such a move into a partnered one. We hold each other loosely, so to speak. But we respect the trust that one another places in this loose embrace. That said, through all this time, and even through years of long distance, we’ve both consistently declined opportunities to be with other partners, and we’ve made each other a strong priority in our daily lives. In other words, we’re more than partners of convenience, even though there are limits to how far we would take our current commitment.
All those things considered, I suppose the chance is always there that he’d be open to a more open version of our already non-conventional relationship… or he might not. Which is why I would raise the question if it became relevant.
As for my writing on Medium, I tell Current Partner about the things I’m writing, and I’ve offered to let him read very personal writings of mine in the past. He usually prefers not to, though… so I don’t actually know whether he reads anything I publish on Medium. Either way, I keep him as anonymized as possible here to respect his privacy. :)
