I'm sorry you dealt with this too. I agree, the good ones do exist, and it's disappointing not to be able to figure them out ahead of time. Fwiw, the ex who got angry at me for not eating the stockpile of carbs that he bought me amidst my salmonella illness was, in fact, extremely doting barely half a year earlier when I had a painful surgery. People can be unpredictable for sure. Here's to finding the good ones. :)