I really enjoyed reading your comment, Kae. I was also wondering how much of this reaction to others is ableist, but I simultaneously was thinking about attachment styles and similar aspects of psychology, potentially independent of neurotype. I think, for example, people who generally present as insecure often are read as grating, but it's because they frequently seem to be seeking attention (whether consciously or unconsciously, directly or indirectly), while most people who are just trying to go about their work day or their shopping trip or whatever don't feel up to the task of performing the kind of emotional labor that is subliminally being requested.

Heck, for that matter, most people aren't trained or equipped to provide the caliber of emotional labor that people in deep need of support might require... so expecting them to do it, or even to TRY to do it, is unrealistic at best and potentially detrimental (to all involved) at worst.

In an ideal world, though, society in general would be much better versed in mental and emotional health concerns and neurodiversity. Here's to hoping we move in that direction! :D