Great point, and I think a lot of people who insist to themselves that they must over-deliver on the material front are doing so in order to compensate for the deficits they're experiencing in actually *connecting emotionally.*

If a wife says some version of, "Honey, I appreciate that you're working hard, but it's not healthy to be a workaholic. We can take the cut in income; what I really want is more quality time with you" — but then the husband responds by completely ignoring this? He's being an inconsiderate, inattentive partner. No matter how much he wants to see himself as the hero, he is LITERALLY ignoring her stated wants and needs, and he's treating money as more important than human connection. That kind of behavior is not attractive to a healthy partner: well-adjusted people like to marry human beings, not wallets.