Ah! Sorry, I misunderstood earlier. Now I think I get what you were asking — and I’m really sorry that you struggled with suicidal thoughts for so long without support. That sounds miserable. :( I’m glad you got through it.

Regarding your question, I don’t know how all suicide prevention hotlines operate, but the one where I volunteered was entirely confidential. No one was required to give us any identifying information about themselves, and even if they wanted us to take personal information (e.g., an email address for a follow-up), we were not allowed to take it. This way, people could feel free to speak. It also protected the confidentiality and boundaries of the volunteers, not just the callers. On the downside, this meant that a person in URGENT crisis had to find someone else to do stuff for them like calling a mental hospital… or they had to contact the hospital themselves. That’s how hard a line the hotline took with confidentiality: we could only speak to the person and provide them with contact info for other resources. We couldn’t coordinate resources on their behalf.

But I can also tell you this, for future reference: at the hotline where I volunteered, we sometimes received calls from people in other countries. Somehow, they’d gotten our number, whether online, from a friend, or from having lived in the same city years earlier. We never turned anyone down for a talk, even if they were not local. So if you ever need to reach out to somebody in a pinch, you can maybe try dialing a hotline overseas. Or you could even try a couple of hotlines just to gather some simple data: do they take your contact info, do they report the call to anyone else, etc. That way, if you or anyone you know ever needs to make a call in a more urgent situation, you’ll know which line(s) you’re most comfortable with.